Communication

Someone asked me why was I taking a communication course in an Masters EC program. It made me reflect on how much I have learned in the last 8 weeks. Without positive, meaningful communications in our field, our efforts to work with families are futile.

I would love to keep in touch with my classmates. We learn from each others experiences.
I wish all well in the efforts to serve young children and thier families.

PERSONAL TEAM ADJOURNMENTS

Army teams, Caterpillar teams, state youth team – The hardest ‘good-bye’ from my Army teams was that we were most likely not to see each other again. The work good-bye was as personal over the financial aspects. I don’t think I miss anyone from work. Being forced out of the state youth team made me more aware of my own mortality. I left office at 44 and could not be re-elected due to my age.  I have been in other teams. But the teams that were hardest to leave were the high performing teams. The twist to this is that it was the teams where we built personal relationships outside of the team goals. Abudi (2009) stated that team leader should allow time to celebrate at the end of a project.  On the state team we received ‘love-offerings’. On all my teams, when there was a major project completed we had a close out meeting which included FOOD. I had not considered how I would adjourn from my collegues at the end of the program. However, we do congratulate and thank each other after most classes in the program.

Abudi, G. (2010). The five stages of team development: A case study. Retrieved from http://www.projectsmart.co.uk/the-five-stages-of-team-development-a-case-study.html

CONFLICT RESOLUTION

The worse thing to have is negative conflict at home, your safe haven. My roommate and I have lived together for more than 10 years due to divorce and personal hardships. We had a pact – no children. Well, in December 4 granddaughters out of her 12 grandchildren have come to live with us. I don’t remember being this loud and fussy. Teenage girls are something to reckon with when you are approaching middle age. Every one was stressed out. I did not want to come home after work. We decided to separate. However, we were both stressed looking for separate apartments and preparing to move. That was one option. However, in this economy it takes 2 or 3 salaries to survive with basic needs let alone luxuries. I decided to try and talk it out calmly with my friend and roommate. We listened to each other. She apologized for the inconveniences. We decided not to move. We set rules and there was no yelling. This was the beginning of us using nonviolent communication skills on purpose.

How Do Others Evaluate My Communication Skills?

This portion of my blog required the student to have completed three assessments, summarize the results, and compare them to the results of others concerning me: communication anxiety inventory, verbal aggressiveness scale, listening styles profile. I had three people take the test for me instead of two: my two closest friends – 1 male and 1 female, and a colleague. We all agreed on listening styles. What was surprising was that my best friends scored me as significant on the verbal aggressiveness and the colleague’s result was moderate along with mine. I am somewhat disturbed that my friends feel that I verbally attack people. To be good communicators we must first know ourselves O’Hair & Wiemann, 2009).  We must understand that our actions are directly affected by our self-perceptions (p. 57).

O’Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2009). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

COMMUNICATING WITH OTHERS

Do you find yourself communicating differently with people from different groups and cultures?

Of course I communicate differently with people from different groups and cultures. I speak differently to our clients who are bilingual, sometimes using my broken Spanish. There is a teacher at our center that I have determined I must pay attention to my words for her to understand. When I answer the phone, I answer differently if it’s my personal phone, the day care line, or the church phone. I often use my ‘church lady’ voice when I’m at church that I never use any other setting. My verbal and nonverbal communication skills all change in these settings.  

Based on what you have learned this week, share at least three strategies you could use to help you communicate more effectively with the people or groups you have identified.

·         I need to formally improve my Spanish. The neighborhood in which the center belongs has become increasingly diverse. As an administrator, I must be able to communicate with potential clients.

·         Deconstruct my schemas (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2009) – I must be able to allow myself to let go of my preconceived ideas of how others should act.

·         Eliminate cultural myopia (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2009) thinking. This goes hand in hand with deconstructing my schemas in order to communicate well with others and other groups.

O’Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2009). Real communication: An introduction. New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

NONVERBAL COMMUNICATIONS

This week's assignment called for us to observe a television show we wouldn't ordinarily watch with the sound muted and then again with the sound in tact.

While watching the show "The Firm" without sound, it was obvious that the main male and female characters were a couple. The beginning of the show they were being escorted through a building as if the man escorting was a realtor and showing the inside of the building to clients. The couple nonverbal gestures of their togetherness were hands held while they walked, when one talked the other looked on with an adoring gaze, the woman did take the man’s arm and draw her body into his. They both were smiling and seemed happy about that showing. In a bedroom scene, it was unmistakably evident that they were a couple.

With the sound on my assumption on the nonverbal cues were correct about the couple. The actors were playing a married couple and they seemed to be much in love with each other. Their nonverbal cues were good situational context. I was wrong when I assumed that they were on the market to buy the building. They were in fact being shown the office building of where the husband was being offered a partnership at a law firm. The man showing them around was a lawyer of the firm ‘courting’ him.

There were many characters in this show and without verbal communications, my assumptions to the mini plots were completely wrong. One man I thought had ill intentions to the main character had been entrapped and was angry.  The main character was trying to help that man. It is clear that one must watch for nonverbal communications as well as verbal in order to grasp everything.

Communicating and Collaborating in the Early Childhood Field

This week starts a new class and new challenges for learning. In my line of work (church, nonprofits, EC programs), I interact with people from all walks of life. I have observed my father and pastor communicate in many different settings. What I admire about Dad is that he does not allow circumstances or others tones to not treat everyone the same. When he doesn't understand what someone is saying, he rephrases for clarification or politely asks for clarification. My father also watches and listens for clues of what is being said by nonverbal actions. These are skills I need to perfect in order to interact affectively with everyone.